Talk in Mens' Language

If you often irritated by men’s ‘catching power’ to understand the most simple instructions. You are not alone. I and some friends have experience it. One of my friends has often complained her husband did what he did not ask and ignore her request, at least from her perspective. If she protests, her husband just said, it should be done by maid. ‘Misunderstanding’ pattern like this is usually happen, the wives want they ’standard’ run, while the husband feel that what they do is “more than enough”.

“It’s like two people talking in two different languages, one with English, one with French, so do not know,” said Rhona Raskin, therapeutist sex and family, owner of Rhona.com. Often, the difference is more vague than the example of the differences in the two languages. Here are some suggestions from Raskin to ‘communicate’ with the men in the correct language.

1. Do not ask him to ‘read’ your mind

If there is a wedge in the heart, say clearly. You may be thinking, attitude or movement that you do is enough for men to understand what you mean. For known, because one thing and another, male is a bad reader of body language. For men, what is not said is none. So, women often blame the man as the person who is less/not sensitive or not able to understand your feelings. Believe me, with the men, words is more powerful than a thousand body language.

2. Talk clearly but tactical

Say what you want clearly, with words that are not attacked him and cause ‘against reactions’. He can response your accuse words like “now you never want to accompany me to the shopping mall anymore” with hundred reasons that through on his mind at that time or hit his dumb wall. Better if you said “I nostalgic the moment like our first date, walking together, dining at our favourite restaurant.” Usually that approach is more effective.

3. Do not expect too much

I don’t know why, usually men are not good enough in verbal expression. “Most of men tend to measure everything in terms of action, especially in the emotional problems,” Raskin said. So, if your partner from the beginning suddenly stutter when you ask him to said ‘I Love You’, do not hope he will suddenly totally changed as your wish. If you want to change it, identify with the real action instead of words. Because men can understand it more quickly. Another example, when he promises something to you, do not expect he will fulfill it soon. Remind him over and over, cause maybe he do it just because it tends to avoid problems with you.

4. Never push him with a difficult question

The questions such as “Am I obesity?” Or “Where better, I wear green dress or black?” Usually got a silent answer or nonsense. For men, that questions was a dilemma. They afraid, that any answers given will make you offended. So, never ask him to answer a questions like that.

5. Wisely choose the right time

Proverbial “wise people know when to open and close the mouth” may be applied very appropriately to communicate with the men. It waste the time if you talk to the men while he is busy watching football or doing his hobby. The most appropriate time to tell him something, Raskin said, is when he is ‘fresh’, such as after bathing in holiday morning.

6. Take a good assumption

Actually, most of men is good person. If he doesn’t say anything after you angry, do not assume that he doesn’t care about you or your aspiration. Most of men are thinking, that the problems will be completed with a depth of think and deed,not with the mouth competition. Trust your intuition when you will marry him. At that time, of course you think that he is a good man and your soulmate. I think, this need to always keep in mind before you attract the wrong conclusions.

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